I realize that a few of my posts recently have been kind of heavy, so I decided to take a break and have some fun with this post tonight. 

Parenthood is a crazy, exhausting, difficult, rewarding, and sometimes hilarious thing. In fact, one of the greatest and most underrated things about being a mom is the awesome conversations and awkward experiences you have with and because of your children. Tonight I have decided to compile a partial list of some of our greatest (and at times, cringeworthy moments) that I will likely have to come back and delete before my children are old enough to stumble upon this list themselves!

To make this even more interesting, let’s turn this into a GIVEAWAY POST!  Read the list and let me know (by posting to the blog or Facebook link) which story was your favorite and why. That earns you one entry. Share a story of your own parenting cringeworthy moment (if you don’t have kids, you can tell me one second hand) and you get your name in the hat a second time! Then Baby E will randomly pick a name and that lucky person will get an awesome (yet to be determined) prize shipped directly to their home!

DISCLAIMER- I will tell you that most (if not all) of these stories happen in or within a stones throw of a bathroom. I will use words like penis and breast pump. You have been sufficiently warned. 

1. A few weeks ago I was with the kids in Walmart on a busy Sunday evening. In typical little kid fashion, C starts dancing around and telling me she really really really has to go to the bathroom. She starts squealing that she is going to pee her pants, so I grab her hand and start toward the bathroom, intending to leave the boys with Tim. Big E pipes up that he has to go to, so he follows us. When we get to the bathroom we find an open stall and C gets herself on the toilet. Big E is standing in the corner of the stall staring at her. At this point the bathroom starts to fill up with other shoppers. Big E looks at me, and in a loud voice says, “Mommy! If C doesn’t have a penis, how does she go pee??” I hear a collective quiet fall over the bathroom and I am acutely aware that every woman in there is wondering how I am going to handle this one. I lean over and whisper, “I will tell you later.” Naively thinking I had handled the situation, I certainly didn’t expect for Big E to grab my face, turn it toward him and practically shout, “No! Mommy! If C doesn’t have a penis, how does she pee?!?!?!” By this time there was quite a bit of chuckling throughout the bathroom as defeated, I just said, “She uses her girl parts.” Fortunately this answer satisfied him enough to buy his silence.
2. One day I was changing Big E’s diaper when C walked in carrying a bottle (with attachment) from my breast pump. “What is this?” she asked innocently. “Remember mommy uses that to get the milkies for the baby, please put that back where you found it.” She left the room. A moment later, she and Big E both burst through the door, each holding an assembled pumping bottle in the air and swing it around and making swooshing noises with their mouths. “We’re firemen! We’re putting out fires!!” they scream.  With that they continued to use their makeshift fire extinguishers to put out the imaginary flames engulfing our home!
3.  One day, shortly after Baby E was old enough to be sitting on his own, I left him in the kids’ bedroom to grab something from another room. This was about the time that Big E was getting really serious about potty training and loved showing off that he was a big boy that uses the potty. Every evening he would use the potty and then run around the upstairs completely naked and talk about his rear end. On this occasion I walked into the room just in time to see him standing directly behind Baby E, hitting him in the back of his head with his penis! I have to admit, the phrase, “Stop hitting your brother in the head with your penis” is not a phrase I ever imagined myself saying.

Ok- now is your chance to vote! Good luck and thanks for playing along!!