06-19-19 Savannah

Tim and the kids took a trip to Florida this past weekend and got home very, very late last night. On their way they took a detour through Savannah to visit the city. They came back with some beautiful pictures and a promise they will be taking me there soon!

06-17-19 South of the Border

I realized I never posted all the pictures from the adventure Tim, Baby E, and I had last weekend. We travelled down 95 again and made it close to the South Carolina border before stopping for the night. Baby E was especially impressed because we stayed in a hotel with an indoor pool and we took him swimming at 10 o’clock at night. In the morning we had the pool to ourselves before we checked out and continued our adventures. We made it to South of the Border in South Carolina before turning around and heading home.

06-15-19 Baby E

Tim and the kids are away this weekend, but I did receive this picture earlier, so I’m pretty sure they are having a great time. In the meantime I’m keeping myself busy editing and watching movies until way too late in the evening.

06-14-19 Deer

The tiniest little deer took up residence next to our basement stairs this afternoon. It couldn’t have been more than a week old. After sitting motionless watching us, it jumped up on wobbly legs, bounced off the house and took off across the yard. It met up with its mother across the street.

06-13-19 A Should-Have-Been Birthday

The only time I ever heard Hazel’s heartbeat was a day forever etched into my memory and carved onto my heart – The day she died. Had we not lost her, today she would have been two.

I haven’t put much time in the blog lately, and I think this is part of the reason why. This day has been creeping up on me for weeks now.

Though I never met her, I miss her terribly. I wish I had gotten to hold her, to have stared into her eyes and kissed her forehead. I would have told her how loved she was and how much we had prayed to have her. But I didn’t get to do those things because she didn’t make it.

At least I heard her heartbeat. I bore witness to her life. I had the privilege to carry her, be it ever so briefly. I was her mom and she was my girl, and I am a better woman and mother because of her.

God is so unbelievably good.

Happy Should-Have-Been Birthday, Sweet Girl. I love you.

This is an awful picture of me, but that’s ok. It was taken at the hospital the day I lost her. In this picture her heart was still beating. What I would have given to save her.
Hugs and kisses, sweet girl.

06-10-19 Recovery Day

I’m not sure if it was the overcast skies or the late nights and long hours in the car, but today I was pretty much useless. I wandered around the house from one half finished task to another. I took a nap. I went to the grocery store. I cooked dinner. But I’m just kind of blah. Hopefully tomorrow I will feel like writing but tonight I just want sleep.