06-15-17 Distant

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Last night, after I got the kids in bed, I wandered downstairs, found some ice cream in the freezer, curled up on the couch and put on a movie. For the first time in a couple of weeks I allowed my mind to turn off and I just existed. These past few weeks have been very chaotic, and my thoughts and emotions have been all over the place. My anxiety has been through the roof, and I have spent most of my time trying to bring it under control. I know this feeling is temporary, I know it’s part of my healing process. And while I anticipated that this week was going to be hard, I was blindsided by the anxiousness that accompanied it.

This evening I decided to ignore the nagging voice in my head that told me to make a quick evening and get the kids into bed early. As I stared at them this afternoon I realized how distant I have been these past few weeks, so I had them change into their bathing suits, and we went to the beach for a little bit more escapism. The kids enjoyed their time there, and the breeze off the bay helped to wipe away some of the cobwebs that have been lingering.

Thank you for all the kinds words and sentiments over the past few days. They are greatly appreciated.

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