04-24-18 Three Vignettes- The Tooth, The Monster, and The Embarrassing Moment

  1. THE TOOTH- C has had a loose tooth for a few weeks now, but over the past few days it has become apparent that it would be shortly be vacating her mouth! She has been worrying and fretting over it and last night she finally came up to me and asked if we could pull it out before bedtime. I took a look at it, wiggled it, and honestly I don’t know what was holding it in. I agreed and got a wet and dry paper towel. We sat on the floor together facing each other. I tore off a corner of the paper towel and asked her if I could wiggle it just a little. She said yes, but asked me not to pull it. I agreed. I put the paper towel over the tooth and held onto it. I didn’t pull it, as she requested, but she made a slight motion with her head that made the tooth pull against my grip and it came right out. I took the paper towel out of her mouth, making sure I concealed the missing tooth as I did so. She looked at me and told me she was so nervous about it coming out and she was afraid it was going to hurt and bleed. She had no idea that it was missing! I told her to get up and look in the mirror and she stared back at me with a look of confusion on her face. She got up, went to the mirror and opened her mouth. A beat later, she swung around, our eyes met, and she got a huge grin. “It’s out?!?!?” she said as she ran back towards me. I offered her the paper towel with enclosed tooth. Her gums were bleeding just a little, and I gave her the wet paper towel to hold there for a few moments. She couldn’t wait to show her grandparents and we even face timed Daddy so that he could see it too. She was such a happy girl!
  2. THE MONSTER- There are certain things that Baby E is afraid of… spiders, strangers, etc… but nothing compares to his fear of the “Mummy Monster.” Do you remember back in October when I took Baby E to the Minute Clinic at our local CVS and he came face to face with what he refers to as the “Mummy Monster?” It was a Halloween decoration that had a ‘push me’ button on it, and we pushed it and it’s eyes turned red and it started flailing its bony arms and Baby E had a MAJOR freak out. Well, he compares all fears to the Mummy Monster. I always assure him that the Mummy Monster isn’t real and it can’t hurt him, and every few weeks he brings it up again. Last night I woke up to an unholy scream- a terror filled wail coming from the other room. I jumped out of bed before I even realized I was awake and ran to the boys’ bed where I found Big E apologizing to a screaming, hysterical Baby E. Apparently he had rolled over to cuddle with his little brother and Baby E thought he was being attacked by the Mummy Monster. So naturally he freaked out. The only thing that calmed him down was a promise he could sleep in my bed, and so I had a bedfellow last night. And my bedfellow was not polite. He tossed and turned. He rolled on top of me. My alarm didn’t go off this morning, but thankfully I had two toddler feet that slammed into my head at 6:15 to jumpstart my day! I will always rue the day we pushed that cursed button!!
  3. THE EMBARRASSING MOMENT- I have been dealing with this cold for about 7 weeks now. The first few weeks were bad, and I ended up at the Urgent Care, followed by a week long prescription and the sage doctorly advice that my cough would last awhile. Well, it has. It’s not awful, and it isn’t constant, but every once in awhile I will get into a coughing fit that takes my breath away and I have to take a moment to recover. And sometimes I just get random coughs that seem to come out of nowhere. Today I was at work, minding my own business, enjoying a mid afternoon cup of coffee. The coffee had gone warm, instead of hot, and so I took a large gulp of it. It was at that precise moment that my body decided to surprise me with a unexpected cough, and since there was a mouth full of coffee between my airway and the outside world, there was no place for the coffee to go, but out. Much to my horror, I spewed coffee OUT OF MY MOUTH AND ACROSS MY DESK AND COMPUTER!! I mean, folks, this coffee had spread and distance going for it. It was a veritable fountain of coffee, a dam had been broken! There was coffee everywhere! My dress, my arms, my computer screen, my desk, my coworkers desk, my chair. Coffee EVERYWHERE!! It all happened so fast that I was just as shocked as my coworkers. Yes, my coworkers were there to witness that. Not content to do ridiculous things in the privacy of my own home, I must perform them for an audience. I sat there mortified before I started laughing so hard that tears started running down my face. (I’ve painted a lovely picture of myself at this point, right, dripping of coffee and tears?!?) My coworkers took no time in laughing at me, and honestly I don’t blame them, that must have been hilarious and ridiculous to behold. I spent the next 5 minutes wiping down my coffee splatter off of every conceivable surface and wanting to dig a hole in which to bury myself!

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