Today marks the one year anniversary of Big E’s big fall. Unbeknownst to him, the shirt he picked out to wear this morning, the one that has been deep in the bottom of his dresser for most of the year, was the same one he wore last year on this day. It’s too small for him now in the arms, and his belly shows when he raises his hands. It will likely make its way into storage after the next washing and next winter it should fit Baby E.

 

One of the many things I love about C being in American Heritage Girls is that just like Girl Scouts, the girls work on badges throughout the year. This gives them the opportunity to experience a bunch of different skill sets. Apparently today was sewing day at her AHG troupe, so she brought home the project she worked on. She sat next to me and described how the single stitches were like dolphins jumping in and out of the water, while the stitches along the edge were just like a snake.

Not to be bested by my broken finger this weekend, I decided to attempt another round of pot pies today. It was less about actually needing more pot pies, and more about following up that failure with a success. I had bought a whole chicken yesterday at the store, so at 2 pm this afternoon I popped it in the oven. The final pot pies were removed this evening around 9pm. Seven hours!! That’s how long it took to make from start to finish. (That’s crazy!!) This time I had Tim handle the heavy stuff. I even planned the cook time of the chicken around the AHG meeting so I was pretty sure he would be home by the time I needed it out of the oven. The pies are now cooling on the stovetop… a definite success!!

I’m sure you’ve heard the adage, “A picture’s worth a thousand words,” and this photo right here pretty much sums up my life as of late. After breakfast this morning, I decided that I would make a couple of chicken pot pies and freeze them for lunches for the week. Before I started, I didn’t anticipate how difficult this task would be because of my broken finger. It was quite a feat to chop up the chicken and the onions, but I got it done. I enlisted Tim to help me with some of the things that required two hands. It took so much longer than it should have, but I was pretty proud of my accomplishment when I put them in the oven. When the timer went off, I got the first one out with no problem, but as I was taking the second one out I could feel my right hand start to lose its grip. Knowing I couldn’t adjust my grip because of my finger, I tried to at least get it back in the oven before it fell, but I didn’t quite make it and it came crashing down onto the oven door and floor. I stood there, just staring at all the hard work strewn across the kitchen. Baby E rounded the corner and said, “Mommy, mess!!!” Yes, Baby E, Mommy made a mess.

Besides the pie on the floor, our day was actually pretty good. Tim and C spent some time this morning selling chocolate bars for American Heritage Girls at a local supermarket. After nap time this afternoon we took the kids to a nearby train display. When we walked in the door, Big E’s eyes got so big. He was definitely wowed by the whole set up. They were able to push some buttons to make sounds, and at least two of the train cars had cameras on them so the kids enjoyed waving at them and looking at the tvs. There were even sections of the tracks that were down at eye level for kids, so they enjoyed peering into this spaces. Baby E particularly liked the helicopter that was flying in circles above the train set. It was a very impressive set up and a great afternoon activity. 🙂

 

 

That’s an awfully big tree, Big E stated as we passed the large lit up tree on the boardwalk near our house. It sure is big, but it’s not as big as God, is it Mommy?

When Big E wants to make comparisons about objects or people, he usually uses God as his measuring stick. For example, Lightning McQueen is a really fast car, but not as fast as God. The Flash is really fast too, but again, not as fast as God. Is it large? Is it nice? Is it strong? It may well be, but not as much as God.

This cracks me up because it leads to conversations about characteristics about God that I don’t typically think of, like his ability to move very fast. This evening Big E asked, When God runs around in circles, does he ever get tired? Um… well…  I’m not sure he runs in circles. But I guess if he did, he wouldn’t get tired.

I know, there’s some deep theology going on in our home. 🙂 

PS- I had some blood work done yesterday afternoon and I got a call from the doctor saying that my iron levels are back to normal. No more anemia!! Yay!!

Today marks the seven year anniversary of the date we discovered we were pregnant with C- my Mommy Anniversary! It’s been seven years since I fell head over heels in love with my dear, sweet girl and seven years since embarking on the craziest, messiest, scariest, and most wonderful adventure life has thrown our way. What an amazing experience it has been!

This evening I have decided to compile a comprehensive list of things that you need the use of your right hand in order to accomplish…(especially if you are right-handed.)

1. Life.

Yup, you need the use of your dominant hand for pretty much every activity in life, from getting dressed to cooking to turning your car on. *sigh*

I was very fortunate this morning to be able to get an early appointment with the orthopedic surgeon. After looking at my finger and the X-ray, he diagnosed me with Mallet Finger. Basically, the tendon that straightens the finger was injured. It was pulled away from the bone and in doing so actually pulled a piece of the bone with it. My finger is unable to straighten.

The good news is, it shouldn’t require surgery, which is a huge praise!! The unfortunate news is that it is a difficult break to heal and requires the finger to remain completely straight for no shorter than six weeks. The doctor was very insistent, and even asked me if I was up to the task, because otherwise it’s pointless to even try. Since I desperately want the use of that finger, I am completely on board. I’m currently in a plastic splint-thing that is lifting the tip of my finger up to line it up with the rest of my finger. The idea is to bring the bones up to the broken piece of bone instead of the other way around. With the finger completely straight, the broken piece has the chance to mend back together.

There is no taking off the splint to let it rest. I will be taking it off only when it needs re-taped or when it gets wet. And there were detailed instructions on exactly how that should be done. I go back in a week for my first follow up appointment.

So while it heals I am pretty limited with what I will be able to do. Jokingly, I said to the nurse, “I guess I won’t be doing many dishes,” to which she smiled and handed me some exam gloves. “You can wear these.” Darn, there was a solution. 🙂

Thankfully there is basically no pain unless it gets bumped or my hand instinctively tries to bend (which it can’t.) The rest of my body is pretty sore from the fall, but that should ease up in the next couple of days.

I had a nice chat with the kids this morning about the importance of putting their toys away, so hopefully that sticks. If it doesn’t the toys are going to start to disappear. Also, that tutu may accidentally catch on fire.

 

Big E has had problems staying in his room at night. No sooner do I close the door then he is coming out of it complaining about shadows, or needing a drink, or going to the bathroom. We have had countless conversations about it and we did a chart for awhile and for a couple of months he was doing really well at it. But about a week and a half ago he started to regress and he’s been having the same evening complaints. Tonight I told him he was not allowed to leave his room under any circumstances (except to use the potty, and he didn’t need to inform me he was doing that.)

I came downstairs and was sitting at the computer. After about a half an hour I heard him shouting upstairs. I guess the kid thought he found a loophole and ‘shouting’ was a lesser sin than coming downstairs. When I heard him, my first thought was that he was going to wake up his siblings, and I didn’t want to have to try to get them back down to bed, especially Baby E.

So I hopped out of my chair and ran for the stairs…

However, I did not see C’s tutu laying on the ground at the base of the steps and when my foot landed on it, both feet slid out from underneath of me, flying up in the air and sending my whole body crashing down. I landed with a very loud thud, partly on my side and partly on my back. And my hand came crashing down, slightly twisted on the bottom stair.

I laid there for a moment in shock. Everything hurt, and I just moaned. After a couple of minutes the pain started to subside, but there was definite throbbing in my right ring finger. I looked over to see it bent somewhat strangely and starting to swell. I got up, checked on Big E and decided pretty quickly to get it looked at. Thankfully, my sweet army of family and friends stepped up again. My sister in law watched my sleeping kids until my in laws could get there and a dear friend went with me to urgent care. We got in right before they closed, which was wonderful.

One of the first things they asked was how much pain I was in on a scale of one to ten. Had they asked me that six weeks ago before my ectopic rupture, I probably would have said “six.” But that pain is still fresh in my memory, and comparing this pain to that I almost said “two.” But afraid they wouldn’t take me seriously enough, I compromised and said “four!” They took an x-ray (fun fact, my x-ray technician was also my realtor! Love her!!) and they informed me that a piece of bone chipped off near my upper knuckle. It may or may not be stuck in a tendon. And I may or may not (but kinda likely, but maybe not) need surgery to repair it. So, I have to contact a hand specialist/surgeon in the morning and make an appointment to have it examined. Meanwhile, they splinted it and gave me some ibuprofen.

So I’m home now, in minimal pain, but bummed that my hand is going to be a challenge in the days and weeks (and hopefully not months) to come. I am so very grateful I didn’t hit my head when I fell. My body is sore, and I imagine it will hurt more in the morning. I’m so very thankful to my family and friends for stepping up. And I am grateful we made it to urgent care in time and that they were super fast. (It saved us a long visit to the ER.) I’m feeling so incredibly blessed right now!!

Please pray that we get answers soon and that my finger heals quickly. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers!

This is the face of ignorant bliss. Little did she know what kind of evening she was in for!!

I reached for a bottle of ibuprofen this morning and paused. You aren’t allowed to take that, I muttered under my breath. But why? For the life of me I couldn’t remember, but I knew it was important. Tylenol is ok. Ibuprofen is bad. I stood there, the bottle in my hand, just staring at it. And then I remembered… You can’t take ibuprofen when you’re pregnant. 

Oh.

I keep doing that. I keep forgetting. I will go to do something (or stop doing something) on the basis of being pregnant, only to remember that I’m not. I rubbed my belly the other day, like there was someone there to rub, but there wasn’t. I would have been twelve weeks tomorrow, well into my morning sickness and almost seeing past it. But instead I am dealing with paperwork and iron supplements and blood draws.

I don’t say this for pity’s sake. Miscarriage is a difficult topic to discuss and one that we often shun because of the pain associated with it. But the reality is that when you experience a miscarriage, it permeates every part of your being. Every relationship feels its strain and every task carries its burden, at least for a season.

I talk to God about it, in the quiet of the evening, or on my commute into work. Sometimes I rehash the story. Sometimes I plead the ‘whys.’ And other times I sit in silence, listening and waiting.

The truth is, I’m not angry at God. Not even a little. Saddened by the situation, yes, but angry, no. Life happens, and life is desperately messy. But trusting in the “Maker of all things” reminds me that even in my sadness, even in my disappointment and my pain, I am so incredibly valued and unimaginably loved.

Ecclesiastes 11:5- As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother’s womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things. 

 

Hillary Scott sings a song called “Thy Will” and I hear it on the radio sometimes, and it strikes a chord.

[Verse 1]
I’m so confused
I know I heard You loud and clear
So, I followed through
Somehow I ended up here
I don’t wanna think
I may never understand
That my broken heart is a part of Your plan
When I try to pray
All I’ve got is hurt and these four words

[Chorus 1]
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done

[Verse 2]
I know You’re good
But this don’t feel good right now
And I know You think
Of things I could never think about
It’s hard to count it all joy
Distracted by the noise
Just trying to make sense
Of all Your promises
Sometimes I gotta stop
Remember that You’re God
And I am not
So

[Chorus 2]
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will

[Bridge]
I know You see me
I know You hear me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness You have in store
I know You hear me
I know You see me, Lord
Your plans are for me
Goodness You have in store
So

[Chorus]
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Like a child on my knees all that comes to me is
Thy will be done
Thy will be done
Thy will be done

[Outro]
I know You see me
I know You hear me, Lord

This evening was the children’s Christmas program at our church. The program was called “Special Delivery” and showed the angels side of the Nativity story. It was cute and silly and filled with lots of songs. I have to tell you, there were moments during the dress rehearsal (as there always are at every rehearsal I go to for anything at all) that I thought, “Wow, there is no way they are going to pull this off,” and yet they really did! The kids did such a great job and had wonderful energy and excitement for their entire show. C had been talking about it all day and couldn’t wait for the evening to come. We had missed a few rehearsals so I kind of expected her to not be very animated on stage, but instead she was keeping up with everyone around her and having a lot of fun doing it. Big E was doing pretty well until he noticed himself on the monitor and then we lost him to his own goofiness. Baby E was a most adorable shepherd, and while he humored me enough to get him in his outfit, he would have nothing to do with actually getting on stage to sing. So he sat on my lap and watched. It was such a lovely evening!

Kudos to all the people that worked so hard to make this night a success. Such a job well done!